I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Randomize