upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
