So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Randomize
