The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
