no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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