it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
well you can't waste a boner
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize