i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
