the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
