i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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