Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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