I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
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