how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
