Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
