This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
