yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
