i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize