Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Did I show you my penis last night?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize