I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I need to stop coming to work sober
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
