hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
