ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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