I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize
