from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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