He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
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