Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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