Cold hands, warm shart.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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