So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
