okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
