ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I need to sanitize my soul.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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