I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
