Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize