Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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