So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
bring money and cleavage
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
