Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
