i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize