I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
