Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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