i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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