So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize