I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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