We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
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