addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
