i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
