Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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