im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
