i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize