Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize
