Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize