After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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