hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I wish there were birth control emojis
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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