Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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